Saturday, January 29

Video of Dead Space 2's Hand Cannon: Bang! Bang!

Bang! Bang! Bang!
It's always good to see game designers not taking themselves too seriously - Bungie, as an example, have a silly side to them in spades, and it's fun to see what the makers of Dead Space 2 have come up with.

If you complete Dead Space 2 on the hard core mode, the player is rewarded with a new weapon: the Hand Cannon. Think a big giant hand that you might shake and wave during an NFL game  and you'd be on the money.

Check out this you tube video of Dead Space's hero, Issac as he gets suited up and armed with the hand cannon:

If you haven't played the scariest game in space since Doom 3, check out a review of Dead Space 2.

Never Gonnna Give You UP

I can't even remember where I found this image - if you have never been on the internet before, you just got rick rolled, Halo Style.

If you want some real Cortana and Master Chief artwork, hit the link!

Friday, January 28

The Lazy Man's Dead Space 2 Review

This time he's going deeper into space...
This has to be the laziest review of a game ever in the history of gaming, all I did was borrow paragraphs from other reviews and assimilate them like the Borg....kinda like as Issac learns, resistance is futile....

Dead Space 2 Review

Things haven't gotten any better for engineer Isaac Clarke since his narrow escape in the first "Dead Space." In that game he battled hundreds of disgusting space zombies called Necromorphs on the planet-cracker ship Ishimura and managed to destroy the relic that was responsible for them, but the girlfriend he went there to save was dead before he ever arrived on the ship.

Now, Isaac's slowly going fatally insane, thanks to the effects of the relic, and has been drugged into a coma and experimented on for three years in a secretive area of a massive space station.

The mission statement for most horror sequels is to improve on their predecessors. Dead Space 2's greatest challenge, then, is to top the terrifying experience of playing the first Dead Space. This is no easy task when you consider that the original game left most players feeling drained by the time its credits rolled. It's even more difficult given that, to some degree, anyone who played through the first Dead Space knows what they're letting themselves in for. Newcomers to the franchise will likely be thrilled and terrified by the game, but is it possible for the developers to visit the same amount of horror on players who know the Dead Space terrain?

Where is my mind?
Like the Bee Gees, this is where you come in. As Isaac, you'll pick up your plasma cutter, don an engineering suit and take the fight to the beasts out to kill you. The overarching goal is to find and destroy the religious idol (known as the Marker) causing all of this, but the story that makes Dead Space 2 great is the internal war Isaac's fighting. Unlike Uncharted's Nathan Drake who can kill a few hundred pirates and never seem worn down by it, Isaac is totally ruined by the events of the original Dead Space. He saw things no man should have to during his time on the spaceship USG Ishimura, but it's the fact that Isaac's girlfriend died on the vessel after he encouraged her to work there that really haunts him.

Isaac's losing his mind in Dead Space 2. The guilt is tearing his very sanity apart. That's heavy stuff and it makes for a really engaging story. Isaac doesn't let anyone else in on the fact that he's coming unglued, so as a player I get to see who he really is and the facade he presents to the other characters. Isaac's internal conversations and hallucinations are among the favorite parts of this game.

Bossanova of Foxtrot Madam?
The Isaac Clarke of Dead Space 2 reacts to the world around him – for once it's not just the player screaming when a monster leaps out of a nearby vent – and his interactions with the game's other characters is less of a one-way affair. This doesn't make things easier – there isn't anyone Isaac comes into contact with who seems overly trustworthy, and Isaac's dementia throws the player the odd curveball – but it does prompt the player to care more about Isaac's fate this time round.

Compared with the first Dead Space, there didn't seem to be as many "gotcha" moments that might have players jump out of their seat. If you've played the first Dead Space, players should have a sense of what to expect in the sequel. For example, that "dead" Necromorph is going to pop up any time now to start chasing Isaac around. Also, players might spot that vent or other opening where an enemy will surely jump out from.

Sever me timbers!
Dead Space 2's gameplay keeps everything that worked from the first instalment and then builds upon it. Combat is a bloody, brutal affair which involves tactically dismembering opponents and always checking over one's shoulder. There's a healthy collection of weapons (or repurposed tools) to collect and players are advised to forage thoroughly for ammunition and health-packs, and to use what they have sparingly. They're also advised to stamp on any enemy they have felled – this prompts an item drop, and it's also a good idea to make sure they're dead anyway.

Dead Space 2 is more than just an action game and it's more than a survival horror game -- it's a game that tells a really personal story about a guy who has been seriously scarred by the events around him. That premise alone makes it interesting, but Visceral Games melds it with rewarding combat, shocking enemies, and huge set pieces before tossing it into a world that's truly creepy and scary

Order Dead Space 2 from Amazon

This explains everything!

Mario Brothers Wallpaper by Gavin Pence

Gavin Pence is clearly an awesome artist (like other recent discovery Issac Hannaford). He's designed a Mario Brothers artwork which I think would just be perfect to use as PC wallpaper:

Featured on the pages of Kotaku, it's apparently called 'Marioseses' and he designed in for his Missus. Bless.

Gavin's about page says "I’m Gavin Spence, a 28 year old human male from Coatbridge in Scotland. I’ve decided to shine the spotlight on my artwork somewhat – in the hope that folks will enjoy it and hopefully commission some work! Who knows." Some one give the man a job!

To make all your Mario into wallpaper, you probably simply need to right click and select the option, else more full instructions can be found at the Gears of War 3 Wallpaper page!

Now go rescue a princess from a dragon or something!

Thursday, January 27

Bulletstorm demo now available on Xbox live

Bullletstorm Demo Version available 

Major Nelson describes Bulletstorm as such "Play through the incredible 'Collapsed Building' level in Bulletstorms high scoring 'Echoes ' mode. Arm yourself with the PMC, Flail gun and Screamer pistol and unleash Bulletstorms unique combat mechanics and skillshot system to annihilate your foes and, more importantly, top the leaderboards! Fight your way through a towering high rise hotel that has fallen on it's side, providing you with a unique and beautiful canvas to splatter with your enemies insides! Utilise Gray's kick, leash and sliding abilities in combination with outrageously large guns that feed into Bulletstorm’s distinct ‘skillshot’ system to produce unprecedented levels of frantic gameplay and yell-inducing satisfaction."

Try it - because if you like it and buy the full version, you get entry into the GOW3 Beta!

You can order you copy of Bulletstorm from Amazon right now.

Wednesday, January 26

Gears of War 3 Quotes

Gears of War 3 Quotes

This is a place holder post for when Gears of War 3 is released and all the quotes from our hero's Marcus, Dom and Anya share in game will be here in their full glory. Like the previous two cames I'm picking any corny quotes and cringe worthy lines!

Mass Effect 3 Quotes

Mass Effect 3 Quotes

This is a place holder post for when Mass Effect 3 comes out - all the choice quotes about 20 push ups and whatever.

Isaac Hannaford's Master Chief and Cortanna Concept Art

You may have read that the concept artist for Bungie, Issac Hannaford has been given the chance to show Halo fans everywhere his etchings. Here's the pictures that he released of the Master Chief and Cortana - the above one was a suggested game covert art concept.

Tuesday, January 25

Halo Concept Artwork from Issac Hannaford

Halo Level?
It takes a lot to make a Halo game. You need brilliant guys like Chris Butcher from New Zealand and basically some really awesome artwork design. That's were Bungie's Isaac Hannaford comes in. As a long term artist for Halo games, he's been given permission from Bill Gates personally to release some of his original concept art to the masses.

Check out the follow pictures that I've borrowed from his blog. They range from Halo 3: ODST to Halo 2. See if you can work out which art work goes with what Halo game...

Concept Cover Art of the Chief and Cortana
Halo 2? or probably 3. 
High Charity
Chief takes them all on in a mongoose Warthog

Monday, January 24

Gears of Halo: We Love You Long Time

cortana large breasts halo
Cortana and friend.
If you run your own website you may have checked the site analytics once in while to see what draws people to the site. I often find amusing the search terms that people often come up with but given the internet is used for three things namely porn, jokes and everything else, it's not surprising some of the search terms that people use to find Gears of Halo.

Take the sexy Cortana for instance, she's the iconic purple princess from Halo that drives the fan boy's crazy with her well defined breasts. So people often therefore search for 'Cortana having sex with the Master Chief'. I can't help you other there but perhaps this article on why Halo: Reach is better than sex might be of interest. That's right, Gears of Halo does it's best to love you long time!

And speaking of Reach, the one armed Kat has certainly caught the hearts and minds of lovers everywhere with search terms like 'kat fucking' and 'kat nude' cropping up quite often.

I completely understand the need to find Aisha Tyler pictures or Aisha Taylor with two Princess Leias because we actually have that! In fact Princess Leia bikinis are kind of mandatory round here:

Double Trouble!
There's clearly a few fans of the Tekken movie too. Some searchers clearly think of Kelly Overton as more than the girl next door... but Dr Halsey nude? Really people? As for your ballon fetish needs we do have that covered.

It was probably a mistake to do a few posts on cosplay. Costume's are a common part of fantasy role play for sex partners, so it is not surprise that Mistress Madi dressed as the Master Chief is a hit through the google search. Sexy Supergirl costume? We have her too.

Why people need to find images of 'nude spartans' and Jun naked is beyond me. Miss Valentine's Cortana Cosplay is extremely popular for some reason too. Can't figure out why.... We have a half naked Ironman (or is this an Ironlady?) as well. Who said comics were for geeks?

Tattoos are also a very popular cultural thing this days, they are becoming more popular as social norms and good Christian values erode and deliquescent youth rise up against their underachieving parents. Well, that's what my grand dad things. He might be right judging by the popular need to find cortana naked tattoos via google. We don't have those but we do have some Master Chief tattoos for your viewing pleasure.

Who said woman shouldn't be in the infantry?
But it's not all Halo related either, Anya Stroud from Gears of War clearly features high in the sexual pleasure fantasies of some fans. I don't think she would pose for those so inclined to see her tied to the bed some how ok? She's a lady after all. An locust horde ass kicking lady, but a lady none-the-less!

So, now you know what people really use the internet for eh? What's your favorite search term? Should I be brave enough to let you leave it in the comments section?

Sunday, January 23

LA Noire: Lies, Damned Lies and Damsels in Distress

This is not Kim Bassinger....

LA. Noire is a new game for the xbox and PS3 that is speculated to be one of the year's most popular games (guess they haven't heard of Gears of War 3 - ED)
As the title suggests, the LA Noire draws heavily from both plot and aesthetic elements of film noir - stylistic films from the 1940s and 1950s that shared similar visual styles and  adult themes including crime, sex and moral ambiguity which were often filmed in black and white with harsh, low-key lighting. Think of Sam Spade and this is the take the publishers are going for. 
LA Noire is set in 1947 Los Angeles and follows LAPD detective Cole Phelps, a returned war veteran, as he cracks numerous cases with a distinct film noir feel. Phelps is played by Aaron Staton, whom you may recognise as one of the razor-sharp advertising executives from the television show Mad Men.

LA Noire  uses a distinctive coloring-style in homage to the visual style of film noir. The post-war setting is the backdrop for plot elements that reference the detective films of the '40s, such as corruption and drugs, with a classical jazz soundtrack.
So what you might say? I've seen LA Confidential! Russel Crowe just runs round beating people up! Well this is where LA Noire makes an attempt to be novel in video game - the core of the game play puts players in the position of investigator and interrogator.
But LA Noire needed something more, so when players slip into the shoes of Cole Phelps , it's the facial expressions and behaviour of suspects that dictate which tack he takes during questioning of the various people he encounters. This is no run and gun set in the 40s.
Reading a look incorrectly could lead our man Phelps down the wrong path and radically alter the game's progression. Just like in life, if you misread someone's intentions, this can have repercussions - same as this game.
LA Noire is available for order on Amazon right now for an April 5 release.

Saturday, January 22

This is what the Chief and Prime do on their man dates

It would simply be rude of a website called The Optimus Prime Experiment to not post this picture of the time Optimus Prime and the Master Chief teamed up to destroy a moa.

Things were not so funny when Prime eventually went up against the Cheiftan Moa and lost his hands:

Thursday, January 20

Portal 2 Set for April 21 Release Date - Plot details abound

Red Buttons always spell trouble....
Game publisher Valve has finally announced a release date for the long expected Portal 2. The cross platform game will ship on April 21, 2011 for Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, PC, and Apple Mac platforms. It's sure to be a popular game - and this time, it's a stand alone game and not part of an Orange Box.

Doug Lombardi, vice president of marketing at Valve had this spin to share "Portal 2 is Valve's most innovative title in the company's history and will be launched with a first-class launch campaign this April," "We're excited to be working with Electronic Arts to deliver this title as we expand our platform strategy to include the Mac and PlayStation 3 platforms."

The plot of Portal 2 takes place hundreds of years after the first game. Despite her apparent destruction at the end of Portal, GLaDOS, an artificial intelligence computer system, is "still alive". The player controls Chell, the same protagonist from Portal.

Portal 2 will take place in the Aperture Science Labs, untouched by human hands but overrun by decay and nature. At the start of the game, Chell is awakened by a pre-recorded male announcer, guiding her through the facility. Chell meets, Wheatley, who has become concerned for the state of decay of the Lab and seeks to remedy it. Wheatley acts as the player's guide during the tutorial and initial stages of the game. The two encounter the dormant GLaDOS and accidentally wake her; the computer accuses Chell of murdering her years ago. GLaDOS begins to rebuild the ruined facility, and puts Chell under more tests, stating "I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster."

Portal 2This month, IGN was lucky enough to get their well manicured hands on a copy of Portal 2 and some nice things to say about the first 30 minutes of the game:

"So what exactly has changed in the sequel? Valve's added in plenty of toys to help you solve puzzles, including spreadable globs of bouncy goo and jump pads and light bridges and more. But what really stands out is the sound. Trapped in your room at the start, you're awakened long after the shiny and clinical cleanliness of the Aperture Science facility has rusted. It's in the process of being gobbled up by grasses, vines, and trees. It turns out you're a forgotten survivor, and your room is only one of many hanging in a Matrix-like storage facility where other test subjects were placed to await their trials."

IGN further went on to say of Portal 2:

"The goal throughout is simply to escape, though doing so requires you to pass right by GLaDOS's deactivated body, which doesn't stay slumped over for long. What dangers wait for you and Wheatley and whoever else beyond that point remain to be seen. The short, tutorial-style challenges separated by elevators that comprise the first 30 or so minutes of gameplay feel highly reminiscent of the first game, but the connecting story sections leave me hopeful that there's a lot more to this sequel in terms of puzzle complexity and entertaining character interaction."

Innovative Co-op Mode

This new version of Portal will also have two player co-operative mode. Two new characters will be introduced for this  mode, which will have its own unique plot and setting. These two characters are Atlas and P-body, a modified personality core and turret gun, respectively; both units are bipedal and equipped with their own portal guns.

Though once part of the networked facility, they have become separate entities and are treated to similar abuse by GLaDOS through a series of complicated test chambers through her "Cooperative Testing Initiative". The robots will make "expressive noises" in place of distinguishable dialogue, according to Doug Lombardi. GLaDOS appears to be troubled by the robots working together, and will attempt to aggravate their relationship through verbal trickery such as praising one robot over the other. Check out the trailer from Youtube which shows off this new game element:

You can pre-order Portal 2 from Amazon here.

Wednesday, January 19

Halo: In 8 Bits and Bytes

So like there's this guy called Eric and he clearly has WAY too much time on his hands - his hobby is to render modern games into the classic 1980's era video graphic format known as 8 bit. Don't ask me what 8 b it means, it's probably something to do with the number of pixels on the screen - just google it! Anyway's Eric has given Halo the conversion treatment.

Any ways, here's the screen shot for Halo in 8 Bit format:

Inn't that grunt just the cutest wee devil?
It's amusing to note that Eric's previous 8 bit effort of DJ Hero earnt him a cease and desist notice from the IP rights holder. Shessh. Talk about stirring it up! Here's a snippet from an interview with Eric from Pikigeek:

PG: So, let’s get this out of the way, after we wrote about how your previous Pixel Force game, DJ Hero, got cease and desisted, there was quite a lot of buzz and fan outcry. What can you tell us about that whole experience?

ER: Well, it was a bit of a headache trying to reason with an industry rep whose ultimate goal is his paycheck, and not what’s actually right or wrong. Other than the email exchange, the whole situation boded well for me and landed me a lot of great press. News sites that don’t even deal in video game news even reported on the ordeal. Overall, I’m surprised to have dealt with a negative stick from UMPG since the project was most likely beneficial to them monetarily. Oh well. What can ya do?

So will Microsoft send in the legal eagles? Time will tell but down load the game for your PC right here, right now in case Bill Gates doesn't see the awesome side of HALO IN 8 BIT GLORY!

Here's the original Halo ring as a comparison:

Tuesday, January 18

Gears of War: Exile - Kinecting with fans?

Gears of War: Exile - Kinecting with fans? 

The interwebs are begging to report that Epic has a new ace up their sleeve in the Battle for Sierra called Gear of War: Exile.

Just as Bungie recently got found out re their new IP, Epic Games has filed a trademark application for an IP called Gears of War: Exile and additionally has registered the logo pictured above.

Is this the game that Cliff Bleszinksi was going to announce at the Spike TV’s VGA Award Show some months back? (And does this all remind you of the whole Halo: Recon / Halo: ODST fiasco that Bunge and Microsoft unleashed?) 

Is this the oft discussed but never publically announced Gears of War game that will use the new Xbox Kinect system?

Given that Gears of War 3 is in the pipeline for a Fall release, it’s unlikely that Gears of War: Exile will get a 2011 release – particularly so confirmed for 2011 is Gears of War 3, which will include Gears 1 and 2 and the “Road to Ruin” campaign that was cut from the Xbox version of Gears 2, and a selection of 38 multiplayer maps (19 which you can download right now from Xbox Live).

So what do you think? What is Gears of War: Exile going to be about? Is it going to be Gears of War 4 or some other spin off like Halo: ODST was? After all, as Epic have shown with all the novels and comics, there are a lot of Gears stories to be told….

Dead Space 2: Mom's of America Hate It

Shoot'em till they are dead. In space. 
Check out this cleaver (I meant to write clever but instead cleaver came out - I'm going with it) Dead Space 2 promotional video that features mothers exposed to the game's most graphic moments and their aghast reactions:

The trailer works on the premise that if a normal mom hate's it, it's gotta be a gotta be a good  thing! It's a very cleaver marketing tool - I trust the mom's got paid some good coin though!!

You can order Dead Space 2 from Amazon today. Here's some plot info on Dead Space 2.

Dead Space 2: You still can't hear a scream in space

Me? Again? 
The sequel Dead Space 2 will arrive to Xbox land and hungry space horror fans in a week and a bit's time and this second installment in the soon-to-be-a-real franchise is expected to be an excellent and polished follow up. You know it's gonna be good because the game is published by EA who put out a little known game called Gears of War...

The game is a straight sequel to the third person survival horror original Dead Space, Dead Space 2 places you as the titular hero Issac Clark forced to to tackle an alien infestation that in the last game proved to be one of creepiest and intense experiences in the gaming horror genre.  Doom 3 eat your heart out....

Dead Space 2, (like all good sequels!) will feature new weapons and tools at Issac's disposal to dismember and defeat hordes of brutal enemy Necromorphs. The  inclusion of a multiplayer component will make Dead Space 2 an interesting online prospect (kind of like how Bioshock 2 had multiplayer I guess!)

The plot of Dead Space 2 takes place in 2511 A.D., three years after the events of Dead Space, on the densely populated Titan Station on Titan, a moon of Saturn. The mental illness caused by the Marker appears to be permanent and continues to have an effect on the protagonist  and hero of the original game, Isaac Clarke. The government will continue to have a place in the storyline, their sinister motives always to be questioned! 

Check out the promotional trailer for Dead Space 2 on youtube:

IGN were privy to playing a couple of levels of Dead Space and had this to say:

"My demo picked up with Isaac back in a version of his familiar engineering suit, which gives him some protection from the beasts along with telekinesis and the ability to slow things down. A woman named Daina is leading our hero, but there's also a guy named Nolan Stross trying to get in contact with Isaac. Daina claims he's a psychotic that killed his own family." Hmmm, can you say psycho killer qu'est ce cait?

Extra for Experts: it was recently noticed that Bungie trademarked the name Dead Orbit - some people are speculating that this could be the name of the new Bungie IP - I doubt it as it's so close to the name Dead Space - what do you think? What's Bungie up to?